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Presidential Candidate And Former President Donald Trump Attends Sneaker Con To Launch His New Shoe Line

Republican presidential candidate and former President Donald Trump carries a pair of his new signature shoes before taking the stage at Sneaker Con at the Philadelphia Convention Center on February 17, 2024, in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. | Source: Chip Somodevilla / Getty

Last year, after Donald Trump’s mugshot went viral following his arrest on RICO charges in Georgia, Fox News host Jesse Watters started floating around the idea that it gave Trump street cred and would attract Black voters to the MAGA world because of Black people’s love for criminality. Before we knew it, white conservatives across White Nationalist X (formerly Tiki Torch Twitter), including Trump himself, started running with the racist AF narrative, which, in their critical white theorist minds, was a show of racial common ground.

So, when Trump announced his new sneaker line, featuring the ugliest pair of “Air Treasons” $400 can buy, we should have expected some tighty-whitey right-winger to boast that Trump knows how to appeal to “the Blacks,” because, boy, do we love sneakers.

“[Trump] somehow survives, which must drive his opponents crazy, because even the sneaker thing. I was on social media last night. Very interesting as you see Black support eroding from Joe Biden,” Fox News pundit Raymond Arroyo said last weekend. “This is connecting with Black America because they love sneakers! They’re into sneakers… this is a big deal, certainly in the inner city. So when you have Trump roll out his sneaker line, they’re like, ‘Wait a minute, this is cool!’”

First of all, what social media platform does Arroyo follow? Because on Melanin X (formerly Black Twitter), Black people relentlessly roasted these fool’s gold-dipped Jan. 6s as we would anyone we caught outside wearing them. (Assuming the MAGA marks ever receive their orders.)

Hell, while we’re at it, let’s take a look at how Black people overwhelmingly responded to Arroyo’s insistence that these gaudy-ass CONverses (or Reebokkks?) are going to Pied Pieper Black people into the MAGA world.

(Side note: Yes, I’m aware that there’s also a video floating around that shows a young Black man modeling the shoes, but all that indicates is you can pay a sell-out to do anything because sunken-place capitalism is still capitalism.)

What is clear is that in lieu of actually knowing anything about Black people, white Republicans have taken to discussing us in the most superficial ways their narrow, flavor-averse minds can muster. Black people see this and get annoyed at the way white people desperate for Black friends (for political reasons only) talk about us like we’re not in the room, but for them, it’s the closest thing they can come up with that resembles racial unity.

Then again, maybe I’m wrong. In fact, maybe Democrats should be taking a page out of the Republican book of DEI pandering. After all, the GOP has been getting well over 80% of the white vote for the past couple of election cycles, so maybe Dems need to attract Caucasian votes by catering to what we all know white people love.

Democrats, you have got to start tongue-kissing your dogs and posting the video in your campaign ads if you’re looking to court the white vote. If you’re not sharing your raisin potato salad recipes on Ballotpedia, you are missing a prime opportunity. Do you have a full spice cabinet in your home? Well, you’re going to need to empty that out before you invite cameras inside during the next election season. And what’s with this showering everyday nonsense? You want the Anglo-Saxon vote? Show solidarity by bathing once a week at most, otherwise, you’re just alienating America’s largest racial demographic. (I bet you’re using washcloths and washing your legs too, huh? SMH.)

Also, don’t get caught on camera clapping on the two and four. It’s the one and three-and-a-half or nothing at all. Don’t turn off white voters by showing you have even a smidgen of rhythm. Just look at the way Trump keeps his constituency in line by dancing like he’s boycotting the beat with the stiffness of dry spaghetti.

Say what you will about the orange menace, but the guy really knows his people.

All I’m saying is turnabout is fair play.


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